Building Trust

The Trust Equation

Trust = (Credibility + Reliability + Intimacy) / Self-Orientation

Credibility

Do they believe what I say?

• Speak only about what you know
• Admit when you don't know
• Be accurate and honest

Reliability

Can they count on me?

• Do what you say you'll do
• Meet commitments consistently
• Be predictable in your behavior

Intimacy

Do they feel safe with me?

• Keep confidences
• Show vulnerability appropriately
• Create psychological safety

Self-Orientation (Divider)

Do I seem focused on myself or on them?

• Listen more than you speak
• Put their interests forward
• Avoid hidden agendas

Building Trust Over Time

Phase 1: Small Deposits

• Follow through on small commitments
• Be consistent in small interactions
• Show up on time, prepared

Phase 2: Demonstrate Understanding

• Listen deeply to their concerns
• Show you understand their perspective
• Remember what matters to them

Phase 3: Take Appropriate Risks

• Share something vulnerable
• Ask for help
• Give honest feedback

Phase 4: Navigate Difficulty Together

• Handle disagreements respectfully
• Repair when you make mistakes
• Support them during challenges

Rebuilding Broken Trust

1. Acknowledge the breach fully
2. Apologize without excuses
3. Make amends where possible
4. Change behavior demonstrably
5. Give time for trust to rebuild

Daily Practices

• One kept promise
• One moment of genuine attention
• One honest statement (even if uncomfortable)
• One follow-up on something they mentioned